}
**We will be away from The Studio & Shop November 20th~26th. Orders placed, during this time, will be processed upon our return. Happy Thanksgiving To You & Yours.

~WELL HELLLOOOOO....Anyone out there?~

**Remember...Click on the photo for the full blog post**

This picture just calms my soul.  I apologize if it does the opposite for some of you..I know we are not all lovers of that crazy stuff we call snow!!!   If you know me, most likely, you've picked up on the fact that I LOVE SNOW...Winter and everything that goes with it.  It's beauty & quietness ..it's ability to render travel nonexistent!!!  I've realized lately that this is the MAIN reason I LOVE Winter....it's ability to force you to stay home.   You are in the clear...no one will question why you've decided to skip an outing when a Winter storm is bearing down upon you!!!  You are allowed to embrace your hermit ways and no one questions it!!! 

I must tell you, I am feeling overwhelmed these last few months.  I need what winter brings...an excuse to cozy up and skip some stuff!!!  Perhaps it's down to bad planning and scheduling or a tendency toward procrastination or perhaps there's something deeper.  Dealing with my father's death is still SO  raw and perhaps it is affecting the way I handle things.  Things that I use to deal with easily now seem overwhelming.  I once had a wonderful schedule that worked perfectly for me and enabled me to keep up with all I had to do.  Things ran smoothly. Things worked well but these last couple of months...it's just not working...

OR PERHAPS there's not something negative attached to this feeling of being overwhelmed.  Perhaps it's the very wonderful fact that I have doubled, in the last six months, the number of shops that now carry my patterns!!! That is such a blessing and I find it simply amazing and wonderful.  Though it does keep me very busy, It is something I am very proud & thankful for.  I now have 14 shops, here in the US, that carry my designs!!  Being a one woman "show", filling daily website & Etsy Shop orders and keeping shops supplied with my patterns keeps me quite busy.   But I LOVE it.  
MOST LIKELY..THIS OVERWHELMED FEELING IS A COMBINATION OF THE TWO!!!
  FOR ME....
Nothing makes me happier than being here, in my little in-home studio, printing and packing,  doing paperwork, planning & scheduling  my in-home workshops, sketching new designs, putting new ideas in motion while still taking care of our home...gardening, baking, cooking, AND of course, time with my hoop & needle.  I love it all BUT, these last few months, I am having trouble fitting it all in and keeping myself from going crazy.  My house is dusty, the baking time is rare...I dread cooking dinner....I did not plant a garden this year..my flowers are sad and my house lacks it's usual coziness most of the time.  I'm finding it harder and harder to find the time for my daily routine...my desires & plans for my business and all the things I have/must do not to mention should do.    I feel some adjustment is necessary....I feel an enormous desire to settle in, enjoy winter year round and embrace my hermit ways.


I need to be able to
work, create my art and keep my business going WHILE still having time to clean my house, bake, garden, walk, take a day off now and then without feeling guilty, go to yoga class or maybe just relax.  Running a business is a double edge sword sometimes.  To keep your business going, you need to put yourself out there with the public, meet your customers, make connections etc....which for me, means doing  the shows, teaching classes, keeping up with social media ..being out and about!!!  But what happens when doing all of that, robs you of the creative flow and down time you NEED to have a business to keep going???

 



I am going to try to embrace the above quote and see how things go!  I have many wonderful things I want to bring to all of you, things I can do from my little studio, here in our cozy (and tidy) Vermont home, while candles burn, soft music plays and something yummy bakes in the oven and I am determined to make it happen.....to do the things I feel are right and not what I feel like I must do. :) I hope that makes sense to all of you.

The first adjustment I need to make is.....I'm afraid Rug Hooking week in Sauder Village (next August)  is going to have to be removed from my schedule for next year.  I know it's a year away but, as you can imagine, there's lot of behind the scenes stuff that is due ahead of time.  This is one of the deadlines I've been trying to meet these last couple of months and I just can NOT do it.  I have spent weeks trying different designs and nothing I create feels right or looks good to me. I'll get it perfectly drawn, transfer it to weavers cloth and then am absolutely unable to make it look right.  One design took me three days just to settle on a color scheme just to have me hate it when it was done!!   No matter what I do, I can not settle in to this event.  Something in my head is telling me it's too much. Yesterday Mark finally said to me "Babe...I think it's time you ask yourself if this is something you really need to do"  "You are so busy, swamped actually, so why are you trying to add more to your plate"   I honestly felt like there was a weight lifted off my shoulders....I knew this but just couldn't accept it.  When he said it, it was such a relief..I was thinking "whew, it's not just my imagination...I AM busy!!! :)  

I see so many folks out there, other artist like myself who have such busy schedules and I often feel guilty and silly for not keeping their same pace but as I grow older I find it easier and easier to know who I am, what I can handle, and just how much I can take and still maintain the calm and relaxed life that need & want.  I just need a bit more practice putting it in to action. :)

Until next time, wish you a joy filled & lovely day.

18 comments

  • Sometimes I feel we need to stop feeling guilty about saying no, and to take time for ourselves. In work places you can take a “mental health” day, we need to take the same time. It makes us a better person. I treasure the days when I can stay home and no stresses from the outside world. After 4 successive deaths in my family, the grief is a tangible thing and takes a toll. So free yourself, do what you need to do for you.

    Susan Norbut
  • Doreen, I’m so sorry for you loss.
    Let your heart lead the way!
    xox

    Louise
  • Colleen, Lois, Julie and Sandra. Thank you all SO much for your kind words and encouragement. It means the world to me.

    Lois ~ I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your dad. Praying you find peace and your self again. hugs and love.

    Julie ~ thank you. . :)mmm…chamomile tea and a piece of chocolate…perfect!!!

    Doreen
  • Doreen, I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for this post.

    Colleen MacKinnon
  • I asked myself, and my husband, before my dad passed in July, would I ever be able to be my normal self again. Still dealing with the aftermath, and like you, looking forward to winter, November, planning quieter holidays, nesting, resting, recharging, and hoping to get back to gardening next year.
    Praying to get back to being myself again, praying for you as well.
    May God bless…
    Lois

    Lois Moore

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